Once a month (lol) we’d like to showcase the races for members courageous enough to spend a few minutes filling out a Google Form, and until we get that sick shout-out from the CEO himself on Twitter or, preferably, Instagram® or Bumble, we will *NOT* promote Run Gum!
Your submission can be as brief or long as you’d like! Better believe I’m deleting any references to Run Gum though, unless I forget!
Are you racing or have you raced in NOVEMBER? I *might* race XC Regionals down in Portland if anyone wants to watch the slower CNW guys get visibly frustrated cause a fat 39 year-old passed them at mile four. Feel free to join me! We can simultaneously write our reports from the Olympia Jiffy Lube when TJ’s car breaks down on the way home.
Here’s an incomplete list of “races” I accept:
Let’s hand it off to OCTOBER’S 2019’s *two* (squints at paper, grimaces noticeably) NOT WOMEN!
One of the Aarons
Member #: 1960
Race name: Cougar October! 7.6mi (~12k)
When was this race? Not a date; or rly a race. At least it wasn’t for me. 😻
How did you place?! Good question. It’s something I’ll never know and will always wonder about.
Race website: cougar.src.org/
*Your* website URL: https://www.rocheam.com/move.html
Crashed car. Dealt with that for an hour and a half. Ubered to the race 35 minutes late. Got a bib. Ran hard. Finished knowing that was probably the right thing to do with the rest of my morning.
[This is more of a diary entry than a race report.] Sorrynotsorry, Joe. 😻
Phew. Where to start? Well, I was up quite early, eager to get everything organized to make it out for my *FIRST EVER COUGAR MOUNTAIN RACE.* I ate, dressed, shaved, taped and body glided-up the important areas, rolled out, and fed kitty, not necessarily in that order, before heading out the door.
I hopped in the EV for the ~20minute ride out to Sky Country. It was still dark when I left at that morning hour, though visibility on the Seattle streets was fine. I got out of the neighborhood with no issue and almost made it to 90 before being run off the road by a guy trying to make a right turn from the left lane. He didn’t see me driving up next to him, pushed me onto the curb, and my tire was shredded from the impact.
I crawled to the next intersection and he followed me there. We exchanged info. We waited for SPD. He left, I waited for a tow company and listened to Jeff from Lincoln towing complain about my car not having a spare. “Sorries Jeff; just do your thang as quickly as possible and keep the conversation to a minimum” were my internal thoughts as I awkwardly grinned and nodded as he patronized me in this moment of extreme joy.
Shortly after Little Boy Blue was towed away, I re-downloaded the Uber app and asked for a pickup from where I stood on the side of MLK Way S and Renton Pl S. To passersby, I probs looked like someone who just escaped from a nearby tent city – hovering around my possessions.
- one bag for race clothes.
- one small backpack with post-race clothes and pre & post-race nutrition. @seattlegummycompany #seattlegummysquad #seattlegummyathletes.
- one pair of trail runners.
- two water bottles.
- a few milligrams left of my self-worth. #metricfreak
Uber driver Issa arrived in his Prius (b/c of course it was a Prius) and when I told him wha’ ha’ happened he was equally appalled and upset about the way my day had started. So, ya know, that was just a refreshing reminder: EVEN UBER DRIVERS CAN EXPRESS EMPATHY. #theh00manrace.
We made our way to Sky Country on Cougar, just past the endless line of cars lining the road leading to the trailhead and the parking lot that was for sure 100% full! I shame-walked with my gear to the start/finish area and was first greeted by Christopher who notified me that I was in fact late to the race. Lol. Yeah. Fashionably late, AMIRITE??
Then I saw Eric and William; gave them the brief “TIFU. Got into an accident on the way to the race.” T.J. at some point came and gave me a pat on the back after asking if I was okay. Then Michael asked if I still wanted to race.
My response must have been “yes” because he handed me a bib in like record time. I pinned it to whatever clothes I was wearing atop my soulless body, tied my shoes with fingers that were already numb from jotting down insurance claim numbers, tow company phone digits, and the names of body shops that were recommended to me, and eventually found the starting line.
T.J. counted me down, I clicked my watch, checked to make sure my head was still attached to my body, then took to the 7.6mi course like a GD man possessed. ish. 55’ later, I got back and, hey people were there!
Stay tuned for the report on my actual race in about a week or so. Or, well, whenever I get it up on my blog. By then, hopefully the insurance company will have the towing sorted out so that my car actually makes it to the body shop. Maybe I’ll even have Little Boy Blue Back among all of my possessions! And those gloves that I threw into the air after I crossed the finish line! Thanks again for recovering those, Dustin!! Ugh. What a day!
#seattlerunning #blessed #humansbeingbros #alwaysanadventure #🌊
H/t Michael for getting me my bib. “As long as you finish before Trisha sweeps the course, then you’ll get an official time!” Uli for the mid-race high-five at the top of Tibbetts Marsh trail. Ryan for quickly grabbing his camera as he saw me approaching his spot on the E. Fork Trail. Kristi, the expert *navigator,* who drove me back home in her Escalade. And last, but not least, Dustin, for his race direction all year out from Sky Country on Coooo-gah Mountain! Photos: pre-race, T.J. capturing some memories on my phone. Race: Ryan Thrower, NW Trail Runs new “resident” photographer. 🤩. Post-race: William w/ 👊 on that team snap!
Shoeless Joe Sez!
“Ubered to the race”
“one small backpack with post-race clothes and pre & post-race nutrition. @seattlegummycompany #seattlegummysquad #seattlegummyathletes.”
If you think I’m linking to what is surely Nick Symmonds’ little side hustle venture, when he’s had two years to acknowledge that **I EXIST** and decided not to, then I’ve got an emoji I can dare you to use next to a misspelled word of your choosing.
Ahh cool! Love this viral stuff!
(tip toes away, stealthily)
“‘Sorries Jeff; just do your thang as quickly as possible and keep the conversation to a minimum’ were my internal thoughts as I awkwardly grinned and nodded as he patronized me in this moment of extreme joy.”
All my women readers/fans are nodding along with this sentiment, knowingly.
“Then I saw Eric and William”
For the record we’re about 1100 words into this ‘race report’ and Aaron has just now arrived at the race. ⏳
“T.J. at some point came and gave me a pat on the back after asking if I was okay.”
“…the names of body shops that were recommended to me”
WE GET IT, you’re a bad driver! Get to the race!
“55’ later, I got back”
aaaaand that quickly the “race” portion of Aaron’s race report has ended.
Seriously though, good on you for getting out there after #baddriving, and racing #alone, and most importantly of all, fitting this race report in between all that #socialmedia’ing!
Member #: 1579
Race name: Cougar 50k
When was this race? 10/27/19
How did you place?! Who cares?
Race website: cougar.src.org
*Your* website URL: https://www.monsterenergy.com/us/en/products/muscle-monster
Fresh off a hot string of DNFs, I came into this year’s Cougar 50k looking to be able to just finish the distance and not quit ultra running immediately after. Fortunately, it was a beautiful day and I’m pretty sure I was contractually obligated to do so.
The race started and, quicker than a male masters xc runner can jump ship to CNW, I needed to go to the bathroom. Too late I realized I could’ve taken one for the team and distracted the other xc teams by causing a commotion right next to the trail, but the SRC squad would need to fight their own battles.
I did my best Joe Creighton impression coming down from Wilderness Peak, hoping not to recreate a fall from last year which ruined my Cool Guy (TM) tights and, despite that, made it all the way to the top of Squak without yet seeing another 50k runner. This is when young Michael Tappel caught up with me. Instead of doing the polite thing and accompanying an “Out of the way old man!” with a shove into the bushes, he rode my bumper down to the next aid station, making the whole event suddenly a race, which is all very frustrating. I would’ve been fine with a nice cushy win, but having to work for it, ugh. Michael then had the audacity to let me leave the aid station at SR-900 first, forcing me to run almost the entire climb until tight hips shut me down and I waved him in front so he wouldn’t try to trick me into any speed on the flats. Then it was just the good old shuffling plod to the finish that wins the hearts of ultra runners the world over.
I finished just shy of my time from 5 years ago when I first ran this race, met Joe Creighton, and got involved with SRC. So maybe there’s some good way to cap off the report there with a kind of flashback montage of how far we’ve come to get to the same place, yada yada yada.
Shoeless Joe Sez!
“Fresh off a hot string of DNFs, I came into this year’s Cougar 50k looking to be able to just finish the distance and not quit ultra running immediately after.”
This is the kind of hard-nosed ambition you’ll get from our former World Championship team members!
“quicker than a male masters xc runner can jump ship to CNW…”
Speaking as a 39.7 year old…..I cannot *wait* for the email I’m about to receive from the Orange Boys. There are a ton of hard bodies over there I wanna interview!
“I needed to go to the bathroom.”
Gotta be all that Monster Muscle you’re (pretending to be) drinking.
“I needed to go to the bathroom. Too late I realized I could’ve taken one for the team and distracted the other xc teams by causing a commotion right next to the trail, but the SRC squad would need to fight their own battles.”
I can’t tell if this is coded language to appeal to your secret reddit group, but…did you actually end up shitting or were you just clenching cheeks for 30 miles?
I’m not going to let you drop this plot point like we’re writing some Gilmore Girls spec script.
“I did my best Joe Creighton impression coming down from Wilderness Peak”
“…from 5 years ago when I first ran this race, met Joe Creighton, and got involved with SRC.”
“yada yada yada”
Archived Member Race Reports
- SRC Member Race Reports – October 2019
- SRC Member Race Reports – August 2019
- SRC Member Race Reports – July 2019
- SRC Member Race Reports – June 2019
- SRC Member Race Reports – May 2019
- SRC Member Race Reports – April 2019
- SRC Member Race Reports – October 2018
- SRC Member Race Reports – September 2018
- SRC Member Race Reports – August 2018
- SRC Member Race Reports – July 2018
- SRC Member Race Reports - June 2018
- SRC Member Race Reports – May 2018
- SRC Member Race Reports - April 2018