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Club News Featured Member Information Race Reports

SRC Member Race Reports – June 2018

Once a month we’d like to showcase the races for members courageous enough to spend a few minutes filling out a Google Form, and until we get that sick shout-out from the CEO himself on Twitter or, preferably, Instagram®, we will *NOT* promote Run Gum!

First-placers, mid-packers, sweepers, we want to hear all the tales: heroism, zeroism, and everything in between.

You racing this July? Probably! Here’s an incomplete list of “races” I accept:

  1. Real races! (road, track, trail, relays, obstacle course…..is that it?)
  2. Strava CRs! (no bikes)
  3. Strava CR attempts! (definitely no bikes)
  4. Beer Miles (5% abv or even PBR beer miles!)
  5. Beer ultras (Fat Glass is coming!)

Submit Your Race Report!

Let’s hand it off to June 2018’s BOSS HOSSES!
🔻🔻🔻🔻🔻🔻🔻🔻🔻🔻

Jim Mansen

Member #: 1569
Race name: Bend Beer Chase
When was this race? 6/2/2018
How did you place?! Who cares?
Race website: Bend Beer Chase
Race report:

The Bend Beer Chase always starts in the cool morning hours and then summer heat breaks out almost instantly and turns any porta-potty into a porta-sauna. Team Beerly Running managed to stay cool thanks to the conveniently-located breweries along the exchanges. Our team of 5 was also supporting a solo runner so while we managed to gain several leads into the exchanges, we spent time in the care and feeding of our maniacal friend in his quest to be the solo division champ. A great way to enjoy the run (and brewery) community instead of our likely Men’s Masters champion position. We arranged to keep the finish open so Our Beery Godmother could finish all 56 miles with a roaring crowd and an awaiting champion plaque. Two teams, one race, and free beer. Seems like a win all the way around.

Did iRunFar interview you before or after the race?: No
Race image(s):

Shoeless Joe Sez!

Ah, the ol’ BBC. More memories from this race than I have hairs on my back. I’d be remiss to not link once more to my own race report from Bend Oregon, ca 2015. I’m not going to read it again; I’m sure it’s aged quite well, not unlike a well-timed Al Bundy zinger.

…summer heat breaks out almost instantly and turns any porta-potty into a porta-sauna.

The key here, having run this race twice under similarly atrocious conditions, is to forgo the porta-potties altogether and just jerry-rig a fancy functioning jar/bottle setup in the car.

Another solution is to just not drink *any* fluids. Run/sweat hard enough and *boom*….no porta-potty needs for DAYS.


Samir Rahman

Member #: 1968
Race name: Color Run 2k18
When was this race? 06/13/18
How did you place?! Who cares?
*Your* website URL: http://www.SponsoredByRunGum.com
Race report:

I arrived in the parking lot, used the port-o-potty facilities, and began to embark on my warmup. I was locked in for this extremely competitive race – I had just begun my sponsorship from RunGum and knew that a bad race would put me off to a bad relationship with the organization. I scouted out my competition, but oddly enough, just saw a bunch of guys jogging in baggy t shirts and basketball shorts. “An easier win for me I guess,” I thought to himself.

The starting gun went off and my body was full of adrenaline. I didn’t want to get boxed in, so I went out hard, threw some elbows (knocked down a kid in the process, but oh well) and found myself quickly in the lead. After the first turn, I noticed a bunch of hoodlum teenagers covered in purple clothing trying to throw purple powder at me! I was both perplexed and infuriated, as I had no idea what these kids were doing, but angrier because this distraction was slowing down my running!

I encountered more of these troublesome individuals throughout the race, though each group had a different color (My guess was that the colors corresponded to each group’s gang affiliation). I crossed the finish line, glanced at my watch, and was shocked. “13:44? There’s no way this was a full 5k. Why did I spend 40 bucks on this stupid race?” I asked myself in utter rage.

Suddenly, I found myself in a foreign land. I was lying down, covered in blankets, and my alarm clock was beeping.

“What an odd dream. It’s already starting to get real fuzzy, but I think it was about running or something,” I thought to myself as I groggily got up to brush my teeth. I checked my phone’s calendar and realized I needed to get going quickly for my race later that morning. I was about to race the Color Run 2k18, a classic Seattle road race known for its fierce competition. I rushed to my car stuffing down a Clif bar, and off I went…

Did iRunFar interview you before or after the race?: No

Shoeless Joe Sez!

Since Color Runs don’t have an extensive database of results from their races, I can’t confirm if you actually did run this race and throw elbows and get attacked by gang members or if this is something you wrote for credit at one of Amazon’s inter-office creative writing workshops. As a double-dipper myself, I suppose I’ll allow it.

I had just begun my sponsorship from RunGum

Wait, how did you get this sponsorship? I’ve been emailing them for months now. Did you tell them about this feature? I *have* to assume they’ve seen it by now but you never know…

I checked my phone’s calendar

#HumbleBrag


Martin Criminale

Member #: 1348
Race name: Alaska Mountain Ultrarunning Camp Beer Mile
When was this race? 6/13/18
How did you place?! I won
Race website: Race Site
*Your* website URL: Link
Race report:

I beat Dakota Jones! Is there any need to say more?

Did iRunFar interview you before or after the race?: No
Race image(s):

Shoeless Joe Sez!

Hate to do this to ya boss, but FYI:


Rufus Park

Member #: 1545
Race name: Hope in the Vineyard 5K
When was this race? June 16 2018
How did you place?! 12th overall
Race website: Results
Race report:

This event was in Benton City at Hedges Winery about 2 miles from my new home. I rode my Stumpjumper on vineyard roads which I discovered are difficult to ride. I was probably the only person that did not come in a car. There were 175 entrants at this wine-themed American Cancer Society fund raiser. The start had a long uphill followed by a long downhill on a paved road with amazing scenery. This was probably the most scenic 5k that I have run, I ran all-out. The course was not marked and there seemed to be some confusion in the directions given by volunteers about half of us ran about 3.5 miles including me. My 3.5mi finish time was 31:06 good enough for 12th overall. I raced with much younger people! I talked with a few people afterwards. A local senior told me about a senior meetup running group in Richland which I will go to some time. This was a fun event for me. Then rode the difficult vineyard roads to home.

Did iRunFar interview you before or after the race?: No
Race image(s):

Shoeless Joe Sez!

I rode my Stumpjumper on vineyard roads which I discovered are difficult to ride. I was probably the only person that did not come in a car.

The Ruf, the Ruf, the Ruf is inspired!

He don’t need no carpool let those knobby tires turn!

That pic of you pulling away from that golf cart has earned you a one-month reprieve from me complaining to the QFC cashiers that you insinuated I don’t put women #1 in my life. Congrats! Wine and 5Ks are definitely part of the proper Boston Qualifying marathon training plan, imo!


Aaron Roche

Member #: 1960
Race name: 29th Annual Fall City Day Run 10k
When was this race? 9 June 2018
How did you place?! 8th/101
Race website: Link
*Your* website URL: Link
Race report:

Highlights/lowlights:

I think we passed two (or was it three?) gun stores on the course on the way out of town.

[SHAMLESS NAME DROP ALERT] I looked down at my watch as we came off the bridge with 600m to go, turned to Amber (Morrison of the Bellingham Distance Project) and exclaimed, “Holy Sh!t, we’re gonna break 37!!?

I thought we were out of the nipple bleeding season and that a race of this distance wouldn’t be a problem up there. Nerp. They buh-led. It wasn’t uncomfortable during the race, though it could have been embarrassing had I noticed it while chatting with anyone shortly after the race in my copper-tinged, sky blue Seattle Running Club singlet.

Did iRunFar interview you before or after the race?: No
Race image(s):

Shoeless Joe Sez!

Holy Sh!t, we’re gonna break 37!!? I thought we were out of the nipple bleeding season…

I appreciate how you censor yourself on behalf of my younger fans with the dreaded S word, but you chose to *not* censor yourself when reporting about your n!pple bleed!ng.

Nerp. They buh-led.

Yours or Amber’s?

Look Aaron, this is a place for genial race reports (and sure, name dropping [and, I guess if you’re Samir, making up race reports]), not graphic descriptions of blood coming out of your….whatever. Less about the bleeding, more about the….feeding (on gels)? Meeting (of celeb runners)? Beating (of CNW)? Reading (of Dean Karnazeszszzes books)?


Joe Kelly

Member #: 1938
Race name: Cougar 14.5
When was this race? June 9
How did you place?! I lost
Race website: Link
Race report:

After a pulled hamstring kept me out of the first Cougar race of the year, I was excited to get back onto the trails for some racing. I took the first few miles out easy and settled into a comfortable pace not too far off the lead (that’s the 14.5 mile lead, Evan (Williams) and Brett (Winegar) were way ahead in the 8.2 mile race). I stopped to tie my shoe at aid station 1 and was only a few seconds off the lead pack of 3 as I passed a raucous aid station 2. I caught the leaders near the top of Wilderness Peak and then opened up a small lead on the 1.5 mile decent. I was immediately confused. I never run the downhills well. What was this alternative reality that I had entered? The lead was short lived as former Portland U stud Alex Bowns caught me about halfway up the ensuing ascent. He sat on my shoulder until I inexplicably fell on the uphill when he decided to pass. Little did I know, that would not the only time I would eat trail on this day. The next 5ish or so miles were mostly uneventful. I didn’t see Alex again, I didn’t see 3rd place again, and the DeLeo Wall still hurt a lot. The real action occurred about 2.5 miles from finish line on the last few downhill switchbacks of Marshall’s Hill. My left leg decided not to lift high enough so my toes caught a root driving me straight into the ground. My right knee was pretty banged up and I had scrapes all along my right side. I got up, screamed a few expletives, and jogged toward Quarry. The last 2 miles were uneventful except for the few hikers that I freaked out with my bloody knees.

Did iRunFar interview you before or after the race?: No
Race image(s):

Shoeless Joe Sez!

…as I passed a raucous aid station 2.

Shameless sucking up will get you everywhere, Joe!

(Sees pic of Joe’s knees)

Gah! More blood?! You know, children read this web blog! At least that’s what I tell the executive members of this running club’s board. The least you could have done was send me a picture in black & white. Or sepia-toned. In fact, that gives me a cool idea. I’m going to find my favorite gif and add some old-timey sepia toning!

Oh that’s pretty boss! It’s as if Cinnamon Frosted Flakes, milk, and kitchen islands existed in the 1890s!

On a less interesting note, I volunteered at this Cougar race Joe’s reporting from and while jogging around the park afterward, *also* tripped on a rock and ate dirt! Instead of blood though, I merely tore all five ligaments in my left knee 🙁 My vibram-clad feet were happy though!

(Watches that tony the tiger gif loop 7 more times)

Nice 😎


Jim Mansen

Member #: 1569
Race name: Ross Lake Rally 50k
When was this race? 6/9/2018
How did you place?! Who cares?
Race website: aspireadventurerunning.com
Race report:

North Cascades is a spectacular place to run. In the long-long ago when I wasn’t a runner, I used to backpack along Ross Lake every year. Now that I’m often a runner, I’ve wanted to return to those trails. This year Aspire Adventure Running Company hosted a trip with an overnight camp and a boat ride that dropped us mere feet away from Canada. It’s a low-key trip with great folks, really more of a group run than a race and just the way I wanted to ease into 50k season. After a 45 minute boat ride with raging water falls and misty mountain peaks, we ran through a campground only accessible from Canada and incurred some puzzled looks. Nice, soft single-track through mossy woods with lake and creek views; there was no shortage of scenery. My watch suggests I spent 3 hours stopping for the scenery and taking photos, otherwise it was one of my faster 50k runs. It was a good opportunity to practice fueling and pacing, and highlight my first run of the season with a pack (oops). Most everything held up pretty well even though I wasn’t quite ready for the distance yet, but I did learn that when everything starts going South just pick up the pace again for a bit and work through it. So I was able to scream the last 5k downhill and finish strong. Just have to work on my middle game a bit more for the Lake Marlette 50k in August above Lake Tahoe.

Did iRunFar interview you before or after the race? No
Race image(s):

Shoeless Joe Sez!

but I did learn that when everything starts going South just pick up the pace again for a bit and work through it.

OH IS THAT ALL YOU HAVE TO DO, JIM?!!?…….I’ll remember that next time my hamstring tears at the 2 mi mark of a 10k xc race and the CNW coach says “Tough luck! At least you guys have enough for a full team…..right?”

we ran through a campground only accessible from Canada and incurred some puzzled looks.

I actually got nothing else for this one…..look at those pics!!


Emma Saarel

Member #: 1947
Race name: Squaw Peak 50 Mi
When was this race? 6/2/18
How did you place?! 2nd Place Age Group
Race website: squawpeak50.com
Race report:

I ran my first official Ultra on June 2nd back in my home state of Utah! 50 miles, 14,000 ft of gain/loss, topping out at 9,300 ft.

Did iRunFar interview you before or after the race? No

Shoeless Joe Sez!

Lose that exclamation point and this is downright Hemingway-esque!

(I just listened to one of his audio books)

(No further questions!)

my home state of Utah

This reminds me of the first time I met Emma and found this out and spent the entire conversation convinced she was Mormon, so I didn’t talk about energy drink’s.


Trisha Steidl

Member #: 328
Race name: Whistler 30k
When was this race? June 2, 2018
How did you place?! 2nd woman, 1st masters woman
Race website: whistlerhalfmarathon.com/
Race report:

I had a lot of fun racing this course. The first half of the course is primarily paved trails and residential roads, whereas the second half is primarily ski runs/roads, with a short section of single track, finishing back on paved trail.

The half and 30k start together, so it’s difficult to tell who is racing which distance. There is an out-and-back section fairly early on in the race, though, so you can look at the bibs ahead of and behind you to see (distances each have their own colour on the bib).

For the first ~10k of the race I was with a group of women. I felt a great energy running in a group with 5 other women for awhile. I can’t recall the last time I had an experience like that. I savoured it while it lasted.

I also felt like the local ladies were using team tactics on me early in the race. It didn’t pan out as I ended up passing almost all of those ladies later on in the race, but it sure was fun!

One lady had started super fast (and looked strong doing so) and was way out front already by the short out-and-back section and I was able to see she was racing the 30k. Just before the half-way point, all of a sudden I saw a lady ahead of me who looked like that lady. I thought, “Gosh, did she take a wrong turn somehow (virtually impossible as the course is really well marked)? Or did she have to answer the call of nature? Or maybe it’s not the lady who had been in first and just looks like her?” Turned out to be her. No wrong turn, just bonked. HARD.

After that point, it was pretty much me against myself, the clock, and a couple of guys as the now first place lady was fairly far ahead and I knew the third place woman wasn’t going to bounce back without some serious magic happening.

I was able to push fairly well, but took a gel that had 35mg of caffeine in it, which is not something I usually use, which seemed to backfire. It actually made me feel more tired (I have actually had another experience with caffeine making me feel tired, but it was significantly more than this)! That was a bummer, but nothing I could do about it other than keep pushing.

The last 3k+ is back on paved trail and the half-marathoners and 30k runners meet again. The trail isn’t very wide and I spent a lot of energy calling out, “On your left,” and other, similar things. At one point, a lady was in front of me and despite calling out three times, she didn’t move to the side. Since I expected her to move, I hadn’t slowed down at all and by the time I figured out she wasn’t going to move, *I* didn’t have time to move (and there wasn’t anywhere for me to go as there was a small drop off to the left of the path and more people to our right). I put my hands out, grabbed her shoulders and, as gently as possible, but still firmly moved her slightly to the right so I could squeeze by on the left. The weird thing is that she didn’t even seem surprised by it (nor did she apologize…there really wasn’t any response…strange). Crisis averted!

I was able to hold onto second and put ~7 minutes on the third place woman, beating the previous CR, but, of course, that didn’t mean much since the woman who won beat me and bested it by quite a bit.

The best news is that my hammy held up for the most part! There was still a concerning twinge, some discomfort, and I didn’t feel I could fully push the last 5-ish miles, but such a big, positive step forward!! I hope I can go back next year!

Did iRunFar interview you before or after the race? No
Race image(s):

Shoeless Joe Sez!

I was able to push fairly well, but took a gel that had 35mg of caffeine in it

Speaking of energy drink’s, I haven’t raced in what feels like 10 years, has Monster or Rockstar or NOS gotten into the ultra distance fuel game yet, with some xtreme gelz that have like full-on GRAMZ of caffeine in em?

I spent a lot of energy calling out, “On your left,” and other, similar things.

For some reason I’m reminded of that Ludacris song that all the #teens in my neighborhood sing at me outside the local Marshall’s even if I’m nowhere near their path and just minding my own business, carrying bologna.


Martin Criminale

Member #: 1348
Race name: Needles 50k
When was this race? 6/30/2018
How did you place?! I won my age group and got 9th overall.
Race website: facebook.com/needles50k/
*Your* website URL: martin.criminale.com
Race report:

This was the 3rd edition of this race and I’m so glad to have finally run it. I usually do better and prefer races with some vertical gain but course takes that to the next level with 10k of climbing. For reference, people were taking about 2 hours longer to finish this than your “average” 50k.

This race starts and finishes in Easton, WA. The first half of this race is remote! Which is cool! You are running through old, big trees, climbing over logs that are 5′ in diameter and you don’t see anyone that isn’t part of this event. Oh yeah, it’s a “Fat Ass” style event so there are only two aid stations which pretty much just have water. Not literally, but pretty much. Plan your nutrition and hydration accordingly.

The second half of this course is more-or-less the last 15 miles of the Cascade Crest 100 course. You climb up to the Thorp Mountain fire lookout and then head back down to Easton.

Everything that goes up must come down and this last descent is a quad buster if you have not been training your descents…

If there is very little aid (and no timing mats, etc.), how does the promoter tell that you really ran the course? Well, they give you a map at the start and there are two hole punches hung on trees along the route. And you need to punch your map with them. For real.

Thanks to fellow SRC member Arthur Martineau for taking the only picture of me actually running in this race.

Did iRunFar interview you before or after the race? No
Race image(s):

Shoeless Joe Sez!

how does the promoter tell that you really ran the course?

Hmm. They aske–

They give you a map at the start and there are two hole punches hung on trees along the route.

Oh I see, you were asking rhetorically.

this last descent is a quad buster

Word to the wise: do *not* google “quad buster” on your work computer if you’re at all happy at your job.

(Leaves to update LinkedIn)


Categories
Club News Featured Member Information Race Reports

SRC Member Race Reports – May 2018

Once a month we’d like to showcase the races for members courageous enough to spend a few minutes filling out a Google Form, and until we get that sick shout-out from the CEO himself on Twitter or, preferably, Instagram®, we will *NOT* promote Run Gum!

First-placers, mid-packers, sweepers, we want to hear all the tales of heroism, zeroism, and everything in between.

You racing this June? Probably! And let me state here that starting now, what I’ll *also* allow as a “race report” are bomb tales about taking down those sweet sweet Strava CRs!

Submit Your Race Report!

Let’s hand it off to the BOSS HOSSES of MAY of 2018!
🔻🔻🔻🔻🔻🔻🔻🔻🔻🔻

😋Flavorful Race of the Month!😋

Ellen Lavoie

Member #: 1738
Race name: Lake Hills 50k (solo version)
When was this race? 5/6/18
How did you place?! I almost won…2nd place overall!
Race website: http://nwtrailruns.com/events/lake-hills-50k-relay/
*Your* website URL: elgranola.wordpress.com
Race report:

Ten out and backs on a flat as a pancake (ok a fluffy pancake) of a 5km course. My goal was to a PR and indeed it was…by less than 10 minutes – I’ll take it! In a small field I managed a 2nd place overall finish coming in a smidge under 6 hours.

Did iRunFar interview you before or after the race?: No
Race image(s):

Images: Yutaka Suzue, Yutaka Suzue, Taryn Graham

Shoeless Joe Sez!

Shout out to recently-departed Rufus for insinuating that I don’t put ladies #1 in my life because last month I had Trisha Steidl at the bottom of the report list, while I was actually merely posting them in the order in which they were submitted! Thanks Rufus, a true blue wingman!

“I managed a 2nd place overall finish coming in a smidge under 6 hours.”

“a smidge under 6 hours” is also how long it took me & Ellen to finish a round of mini golf and 8 rounds of oyster shooters at Flatstick Pub at a #srcbrooks party last year. Congrats Ellen! Fluffy pancakes are great, but any course that has “10 out and backs” in its course description is the opposite of that. You are #1 in my life!


Trisha Steidl

Member #: 328
Race name: Rhody Run 12k
When was this race? 5/21/2018
How did you place?! 2nd woman overall, 1st masters woman
Race website: http://www.rhodyrun.com
Race report:

This race has become an annual tradition for the Steidl household. We run this even if we just came back from across the country, have an injury, are sick, just raced a marathon, whatever. No excuses! The setting is beautiful and I love the small town feel and cheering.

I didn’t come into the race with big expectations as I learned just a couple weeks before the race that my hamstring was partially torn. Long story short, it had already been healing for quite awhile and in this race I could feel another step in a positive direction of healing as I was finally able to run uphill with some semblance of strength (which was good because this course is pretty hilly).

I was happy to run to a 2nd place finish, continue my streak of finishing as the top masters woman, and represent SRC on the podium!

As always I got to meet new people, reconnect with long time friends, and enjoy the wonderful atmosphere.

Did iRunFar interview you before or after the race?: No

Shoeless Joe Sez!

“I learned just a couple weeks before the race that my hamstring was partially torn”

Whoa! I also tore my hamstring! (High five) But….back in November 2017, and I can still taste the pudding I ate all day for about 3 months while I did *not* race 12Ks.

“top masters woman”

One thing that’s becoming more and more frequent an occurrence is me passing a teen in a race cause they went out too fast and their friends seem to invariably witness it from the side of the course and will laugh at their friend getting passed by a “old masters runner” and I’ll yell out “joke’s on you teens; I’m not masters yet!” And I’ll usually hear them muttering to themselves something like “Look at his eyebrows, no way he’s not 45 years old!” and I’ll just shake my head and feel sorry for them.

“woman”

You’re #1 in my life, Trisha!


Ryan Parker

Member #: 1548
Race name: Sunflower Marathon
When was this race? 5-5-2018
How did you place?! 4th Place
Race website: Link
*Your* website URL: https://www.strava.com/athletes/7278262
Race report:

Beautiful course, nice weather, sunflowers in full bloom, a good friend stride for stride with me the entire way. I ran about as fast as I could reasonably have hoped given that I didn’t do much marathon-specific training and have been dealing with injuries this winter and spring. Other than a brief bout with quad cramps around mile 21 I felt great the whole way. The post-race grain and vegetable bowls were fantastic too. I highly recommend this race.

Did iRunFar interview you before or after the race?: No

Shoeless Joe Sez!

Based on your glowing review, allow me to be the first to congratulate whichever family member of yours organizes this race!

“The post-race grain and vegetable bowls were fantastic too. I highly recommend this race.”

Maybe it’s just the 12 year old in me, but if I’m going to run a trail marathon (someday! once this psoriasis clears up!), and I’m presented with a grain and vegetable bowl on the nicer side of the finish line, my reaction would likely be along the lines of:


Aaron Roche

Member #: 1960
Race name: Joe Hourigan Memorial Midleton 5 Mile Road Race 2018
When was this race? 3 May 2018
How did you place?! 36/594, 1st American! (1/1) 🤣
Race website: Link
*Your* website URL: rocheam.com/move.html#MidletonAC5
Race report:

“Hijacking this space to direct traffic to the full recap on my website.

Tl;dr
– I raced patiently and wise
– 600 runners from various athletics clubs in Co. Cork in Southwest Ireland for a local race starting at *8pm!* on a Thursday night!
– Spectator friendly event. The course is woven through the countryside on roads that are lined with stone walls, spotted with cow poop, and are closed to traffic during the event. Locals come out from behind their walled compounds to cheer the racers passing by. I couldn’t get any of my cousins to stick around during the race, although the various Irish folks cheering us on was helpful enough.
– The entry fee for this race was €10.95! (That’s pronounced “ten Euro ninety-five” or super effin’ cheap!)
– For 11 quid you got: a pre-race gala and post-race party with food and drink, a tote bag with the race logo that contained a Mars bar, a banana, and postcards about the local sponsors and cubs. Chocolate milk was handed out by local dairy farmers at the finish. I passed on that last option. NAF of cow’s milk, but I appreciated the gesture!”

Did iRunFar interview you before or after the race?: No
Race image(s):

Shoeless Joe Sez!

Our 1st international submission!

“I couldn’t get any of my cousins to stick around during the race”

Aaron Roche: “Hello cousin, please watch me race?”

Aaron Roche’s red-headed cousin: “Naw cuz, yous shorts are a holy show! I’m knackered, gonna leg it to the pub and git on the tear Guinness Tayto Hurling Jameson Murphy*. Gonna be a craic, don’t follow me” (throws cigarette at Aaron)

*I’m Irish, I can make this (good) joke

“…that contained a Mars bar, a banana, and postcards about the local sponsors and cubs.”

Was always a Les Lancaster man myself

Congrats Aaron, that singlet looks pretty swank on ya.


Dan Myers

Member #: 1627
Race name: Kal’s Knoya Ridge Race 2018
When was this race? May 24
How did you place?! 40th
Race website: Link
*Your* website URL: lol
Race report:

Things are good up here! I miss the banter of The FLB 5miler. No Bodhizafa up here. 🙁 As I write this, I am 40 minutes from starting a 1/2 marathon but I destroyed myself on Thursday in a race that was a 4.4k climb over 5+ miles. Wish you all would come up for a race. ❤ to the SRC peeps. Gotta warm up now, but sexting with you was a good start.

Did iRunFar interview you before or after the race?: No
Race image(s):

Shoeless Joe Sez!

……interesting race report, Dan!

“❤ to the SRC peeps.”

Good to hear you’re still alive Danny, though possibly barely functioning without the all-powerful Bodhi. That pic of you looks like after that Lincoln Park XC workout in 2015 when we made you walk to Beveridge Place. In your honor, here’s a random guy on the internet who’s really fired up about that thicc Bodhi head. Cheers!


Brett Walton

Member #: 1581
Race name: Ski to Sea
When was this race? May 27, 2018
How did you place?! 6th in the downhill run
Race website: SkitoSea.com
Race report:

Sprinting 8 miles downhill, as you do for the Ski to Sea running leg, is a great way to get a gnarly pump going in your calves and quads. Two days later I still can’t use stairs like a normal person.

Did iRunFar interview you before or after the race?: No
Race image(s):
Brett Walton, Ski to Sea 2018

Shoeless Joe Sez!

“…a great way to get a gnarly pump going”

Lookit this guy, looking like a 1989 brah from California. In his honor:

My Best Guess at This Dude’s Top 5 Mountain Dew varietals

5. Mountain Dew Supyrnova Iced Arctic Storm
4. Mountain Dew Call of Duty Xtreme Gamer Alliance Squadron Blue Edition #3
3. Mountain Dew, original
2. Mountain Dew 5% Swole
1. Mountain Dew Baja Blast


Aaron Roche

Member #: 1960
Race name: UW Bothell Husky 5k
When was this race? 19 May 2018
How did you place?! 5 places and 56s ahead of Samir Rahman
Race website: https://www.uwb.edu/alumni/events/5krun
*Your* website URL: http://www.rocheam.com/move
Race report:

It was a typical 5k. Nothing too extraordinary to report. Actually, it was about 150m or so short of the full 5k. It was fairly hilly for a road race at that distance and was probably a sub-18 effort, though the 17’39” finish time is probably a tad misleading.

Btw, did I mention I beat Samir? By 56 seconds? Okay he had a rough week, but when you talk smack, are you allowed to make excuses??

Did iRunFar interview you before or after the race?: No
Race image(s):

Shoeless Joe Sez!

“150m or so short of the full 5k”

How’d you know the nickname my high school XC coach gave me?!

“Btw, did I mention I beat Samir?”

Yeah you did, way to bring out the welcome wagon for one of our newer members! I see you’re also posing with a guy in a CNW shirt who’s developing a pretty nice neard, but instead of teaming up with Samir to think of all the different words that rhyme with “neard” and getting that freestyle* ready, you’re making fun of your teammate! #kissesnotdisses #teamsamir

*”Next to Samir I peered at a weird neard that nobody feared

He ran for a club that nobody cheered”

#justkidding #friends #friendly #rivals #alllove #src❤️cnw


Categories
Club News Featured Member Information Race Reports Uncategorized

SRC Member Race Reports – April 2018

Once a month we’d like to showcase the races for members courageous enough to spend a few minutes filling out a Google Form, and until the boxes or $ starts rolling in, we would like to *NOT* promote Run Gum!

First-placers, mid-packers, sweepers, we want to hear all the tales of heroism, zeroism, and everything in between. Let’s celebrate the old fashioned written word to combat this sport’s descent into selfies, IG stories and GoPro madness (that said, selfies, IG stories, and GoPro madness are all happily accepted as part of your reports). I’ll try to provide incisive commentary on races if I feel the urge. #SorryNotSorry if it’s not very witty or informative or useful in any way.

You racing this May?

Submit Your Race Report!

Let’s hear from our inaugural reporters, who raced like BOSS HOSSES this April of 2018!
🔻🔻🔻🔻🔻🔻🔻🔻🔻🔻

Martin Criminale

Martin Criminale Yakima Skyline 50k 2018
Member #: 1348
Race name: Yakima Skyline Rim 50k
When was this race? 4/21/18
How did you place?! 2nd – Men 50-59
Race website: Link
*Your* website URL: Link
Race report:

Okay, so this race is not 100% up and down, it’s just about 90% up and down. But luckily most of that flat 10% is rocky. I got what I wanted, a hard 50k. This course took me a little more one hour longer than the Chuckanut 50k for reference. This really fast (because, you know, anyone faster than me must be REALLY, REALLY FAST) guy from MT beat me by 12 minutes. He has beaten me before and I didn’t like it this time either. Amazing views, you could see Mt Adams, Mt Rainier, some mountain that I forgot the name of, and lots of rocks. The tallest plant on this course is about 3′. I fell three times and broke one trekking pole. There is no shade. But there was wind, strong enough to move me sideways on the last descent when both of my feet were off the ground. But there was pizza and beer at the finish. And each time I fell some nice person stopped for a minute to see if I was okay. Each time I lied and carried on. The overall winner ran in a button down shirt. I’m sore today. I should buy more button down shirts.

Did iRunFar interview you before or after the race?: No
Race image(s): Martin Criminale Yakima Skyline 50k 2018Martin Criminale Yakima Skyline 50k 2018 Martin Criminale Yakima Skyline 50k 2018 Martin Criminale Yakima Skyline 50k 2018

Shoeless Joe Sez!

Well, he was #FIRST! so I guess we should start this whole thing off with the club president huh?

“The tallest plant on this course is about 3′.”

I’ve always been kinda interested in running this race, but I’m always wary of reg’ing for races like 9 months in advance when I can’t be sure I’ll ever be healthy for more than 2 weeks at a time. But 3 feet tall plants? COUNT ME IN FOR 2019!

“But there was pizza and beer at the finish.”

This put a smile on my face. I fondly remember back when I was 16 years old, my dad gave me my first sip of beer when the waiter’s back was turned. And I was all “NO THANKS lol 🤢🤮😂” Once I hit my 30s though, something flipped in my brain and now I can easily split a beer with my dad with relatively few problems at reasonably-priced eateries.


😋Flavorful Race of the Month!😋

Spencer Gaddy

Member #: 1874
Race name: Boston
When was this race? 16/4/18
How did you place?! I lost
*Your* website URL: Link
Race report:

I spent the winter gearing up for the Boston Marathon by running cold, dark, and wet ovals during SRC Wednesday Workouts, then logging steady miles by the waterfront on weekends. Fortunately the weather for the race was just as shitty as during the training, so I was ready. As I sheltered from the rain during my morning duties (doodies) in the porta-john on marathon Monday, I thought to myself “It’s nice and dry in here, how long can I stay?”

I shed my warmups and rain cape just minutes before the start as the rain came down, looking forward to running if only for the warmth.

I settled into my rhythm in the first few miles and used the first 6 mostly-downhill miles to easily run at race pace. Through 15 miles I focused on hydrating, eating and running steady but to not expend any unnecessary energy. At mile 16 I was expecting a big downhill and used it not to go faster but to rest for the upcoming ‘Newton hills’.

When the rolling hills came around mile 17 I felt strong, but was careful not to immediately expel all the energy and strength I had worked to save. Over the top of the hills around mile 21 I put in a bit of effort to get back up to speed over the hills. At this point of the race I was reacquainted with my marathon legs, the legs that will not go faster, the brain and heart say “sub 6 minute pace” but the legs say “I don’t know how to do that”. As I struggled to find the speed I knew my legs had, I was snapped back to the moment by another runner yelling ferociously at himself as if vocalizing his motivation would help. A crowd member yelling “F#CK Yeah Seattle!” at me renewed my focus on the race as I drained the rest of the fast out of my legs to push through downtown Boston and cross the finish line in 2:44:58 (chip).

Did iRunFar interview you before or after the race?: No

Shoeless Joe Sez!

“duties (doodies)”

Nice 😎

“I drained the rest of the fast out of my legs to push through downtown Boston and cross the finish line in 2:44:58 (chip).”

Full disclosure: I’ve run workouts with Spencer a few times. He’s a former competitive cyclist, so naturally much of our conversation during rest periods is me making spectacularly-broad negative generalizations about PNW cyclists and him politely going “……yeah, I guess” til the next interval starts. All that to say (no offense Spenc), I had *no* idea this guy could run a 2:44:58 in those atrocious conditions. Until I can manage to beat that time, I will shut up (to him, on Wednesdays, at the Garfield High School track) about idiot cyclists.

A performance this strong simple *has* to be my first-ever Flavorful Race of the Month!®™©, even though he lost.


Joe Kelly

Member #: 1938
Race name: Oiselle Tenacious Ten Mile
When was this race? 4/21
How did you place?! I won
Race website: Link
Race report:

I decided two days before the race to sign up for the ten miler (there was also a 10k) because I wanted to do a nice long tempo. I got to Gas Works Park about 45 minutes before the start and immediately had to use the facilities. Those were the cleanest port-o-potties that I have ever seen (I guess that’s what happens when a group of women organize the race – nice work Oiselle!). After a quick warm up, I headed toward the start line to be greeted by Aid Station #2’s Olin Berger who was there cheering on his girlfriend.

Because the 10k had some decent prize money, there were quite a few elite women and Club NW dudes (one of those jokers decided to go shirtless on the 45 degree morning) so I grabbed a spot about 5 rows back. The 10kers were blazing form the start (a couple of sub 31 dudes and a sub 34 female – damn fast!) so I settled in just under 6 minute pace with what seemed to be a mixed pack of 10 milers. At 5 miles, where the two courses split, our pack was down to two – 2 time Olympian Kara Goucher and me. According to her Wikipedia page, all of her PRs are faster than mine except for the 1500. We clipped off a couple 5:50s while passing the dude in second and closing the gap with the leader. I started pulling away at the first hairpin turn around mile 7, much to the dismay of the predominately female field who wanted to see the Oiselle star take the overall W. I overtook the lead with a little over a mile to go and cruised into Gas Works with an 18s victory. Goucher ended up in 5th overall about 30s back. She thanked me for my 3 miles of “pacing” and gave me quite the high five.

I had friends running the Yakima Skyline 50k so I couldn’t stick around for the awards. I Irish goodbye’d out of there and hightailed it to Ellensburg.

Oiselle did a great job organizing the race and I felt pretty great for most of the run. Definitely a win-win.

Did iRunFar interview you before or after the race?: No

Shoeless Joe Sez!

“I got to Gas Works Park about 45 minutes before the start and immediately had to use the facilities.”

When I proposed this feature for the site about 3 years ago, this is more or less the exact example sentence I used for what people could be telling us about their races.

“…and a sub 34 female”

Mel Lawrence. On my interview bucket list. (‘sup, Mel.)

“At 5 miles, where the two courses split, our pack was down to two – 2 time Olympian Kara Goucher and me. According to her Wikipedia page, all of her PRs are faster than mine except for the 1500.”

Oh man, I *really* hope you told her this at some point during the race.

“Goucher ended up in 5th overall about 30s back. She thanked me for my 3 miles of ‘pacing’ and gave me quite the high five.”

Right right, congrats on the hand contact, but did you hand her an SRC membership form or not? I still don’t see her name on our member list.

“I had friends running the Yakima Skyline 50k…”

Nice #humblebrag about having friends. 😒


Max Ferguson

Member #: 1247
Race name: Yakima Skyline 50k
When was this race? 4/21/18
How did you place?! 4th
Race website: Link
Race report:

Regret is not a meal best served cold. Thats revenge. However, regret could be a tex-mex dish served in a curiously expensive food emporium adjacent a Yakima winery. This is a story of the latter.

5:00 am 4/21/18. I awake without the grogginess of pre-evening drinks at The Brick, or of the reefer the cooks at the bar were smoking that evening. The air is cold in Roslyn, the drive to Yakima is longer than I’d like, and the gas station coffee is sufficient. No regrets have yet to occur.

7:00 am 4/21/18. The Italian rimpiangere phase of the race. I manage a nice pre-race constitutional. As does Grete. I regret not bringing more poop bags.

8:01 am 4/21/18. The Albanian keqardhje phase of the race. The race starts. I regret somehow being in the front. For some ungodly reason it is holy ultrarunning scripture to run a near army crawl pace from the gun. I regret this is the only sport I’m half decent at.

8:03 am 4/21/18. The French katua phase of the race. We hit the first uphill. I start walking, the rest of the field behind me does not. I regret taking a prerace dump wishing I could instead crop dust these sand baggers. I do not regret not running more section line repeats. This portion of the race blows goats.

8:35 am 4/21/18. The German bedauern phase of the race. The lead group hits the ridgeline. I begin running. The rest of the leaders seamlessly transition from running up a 60% grade to picking wildflowers at a pace befitting a 90 year old. I do not regret making up all the distance they put on me on the climb with near zero effort. This pacing is Donald Trump-level consistent. Oscillating wildly between extremes.

9:15 am 4/21/18. The Welsh yn ofid phase of the race. After completely destroying ourselves for no reason, then erasing all forms of competitive pace on the flats once more. The lead group hits the first climb. For the first time all day I am running some uphill. I think to myself I am going to “wreck some fools” in an hour or so. I might regret this line of thinking.

9:45 am 4/21/18. The Polish zal phase of the race. I notice my legs are already sunburned. I regret not wearing sunscreen. This will not get better in future phases.

10:15 am 4/21/18. The Spanish lamentar phase of the race. The descent into Buffalo Road has completely decimated what feeling my feet never had. I regret believing any rockplate is worth a damn.

10:25 am 4/21/18. The Dutch betreuren phase of the race. The lead group hits the Buffalo Road aid station. My plan is to run the entire climb out of the aid, then coast on good good good vibrations to a victory. I regret bringing my Nathan softflask, it literally takes multiple people and several minutes just to put the cap on.

10:27 am 4/21/18. The Cebuano ikasubo phase of the race. The cap is not on the softflask. I dont regret the moisture from the leaking bottle at this point in the race. It is nice and cooling. I blame Rob Krar.

11:00 am 4/21/18. The Scottish Gaelic aithreachas phase of the race. I just successfully ran nearly that entire climb. Somehow I’m farther behind Mike Wolfe than when I started the climb. I am also in a world of hurt. I regret that my race plan only had one step to it.

11:30 am 4/21/18. The Corsican rigrettu phase of the race. I am yet farther behind Mike Wolfe. Catching second now seems a desperate proposition. I trip no less than 4 times on this descent and still to this day don’t know how I didnt eat a face full of tumbleweed. I regret not picking my feet up better. This is going to be a very VERY long next hour.

11:55 am 4/21/18. The Afrikaans spyt phase of the race. I am staring up at the final climb. 2nd and 3rd are not far away. They are walking. I however am in full cramped leg lock mode. I am walking sideways up the climb. This is not as efficient. In fact, one could say it’s both stupid, and stupid looking. I am regretting not doing like ONE additional section line repeat.

12:40 pm 4/21/18. The Sudanese kaduhung phase of the race. I have made it to the top of the final climb. I leaked time to both remaining podium positions like a colander. I dreamt of running this final ridgeline with Walmsley-esque form. Unlike Letsrun.com, those dreams are not a reality.

12:20 pm 4/21/18. The English regret phase of the race. I finish the descent back to Umtaneum Canyon. My feet are hamburger. Thinking of this makes me wish I’d eaten a hamburger since the last aid station. Or a gel. Or anything. I arrive at the parking lot and realize we now need to run a quarter mile around it to the finish. To be clear here, my legs cannot move. Running is as much an option for me now as Joe Creighton modeling for L’Oreal. Attempting to hobble to the finish line I regret checking over my shoulder for anyone hot on my tail. I think my best race strategy at that point would be to throw my leaky soft flask at them.

12:27 pm 4/21/18. Finish. I somehow do not regret running the race.

12:28 pm 4/21/18. I regret not bringing a glass for the keg.

6:32 am 4/22/18. I awake. Instantly I regret trail running being the only thing I’m passably competitive at. I should have focused on something less painful like competitive oil painting, or poetry jams.

8:00 am 4/23/18. A friend emails me a link to a race in Idaho. I spend 2 hours investigating it. I have yet to learn from all the phases of these damn races.

Did iRunFar interview you before or after the race?: No

Shoeless Joe Sez!

“As does Grete”

You still trying to get this dog over?

“Running is as much an option for me now as Joe Creighton modeling for L’Oreal.”

Another crack like that and next time I’m not gonna spend 20 minutes fixing all your formatting/grammer/spelling issues!,

“Instantly I regret trail running being the only thing I’m passably competitive at.”

“Most Burner Accounts on the LetsRun Message Board” not a competition anymore?

“I regret not bringing a glass for the keg.”

Their post-race keg was “cupless”?? Allow me to use this opportunity to promote the Cougar Mtn Summer Series, which includes Flying Lion Brewing kegs (made-specifically-for-us Cougar Mountain Kolsch available May 12th, post-race!) and hands out drinkin’ hardware when you cross the finish line.

I love Max enough that I read most of his report, but I understand if many of you just don’t have the time. So, tl;dr: he took a nice pre-race dump and got 4th overall.


Martin Criminale

Martin Criminale Chirico 10 Peat 2018

Member #: 1348
Race name: Chirico Tenpeat
When was this race? 4/25/2018
How did you place?! 2nd Overall
Race website: Link
*Your* website URL: Link
Race report:

This race is a challenge by choice. You can do 1-10 laps of the Chirico Trail up to Poo Poo Point on Tiger Mt. I tried to do all 10 in 2014 and failed, this time I made it and surprised myself with 2nd place. It’s always on a Wednesday to avoid the weekend hiker traffic. This year it took me TEN HOURS to finish, but on reflection, it would have taken me over 10 hours back in 2014 if I had been able to finish…the event is put on by the Seattle Mountain Running Group Facebook Group (Jess Mullen specifically) and is a massive community effort. Officially there is no aid, no timing, no nothing; but we had the best aid station I have ever experienced, digital timing and loads of support including two event photographers. Wow.

Did iRunFar interview you before or after the race?: No
Race image(s): Martin Criminale Chirico 10 Peat 2018 Martin Criminale Chirico 10 Peat 2018 Martin Criminale Chirico 10 Peat 2018 Martin Criminale Chirico 10 Peat 2018

Shoeless Joe Sez!

“Martin Criminale”

You again?

“This race is a challenge by choice. You can do 1-10 laps of the Chirico Trail up to Poo Poo Point on Tiger Mt.”

As someone who once ran back and forth on Madison St from Lake Washington to Puget Sound like 4 times, and then shuffled through the world’s saddest “cooldown” just so I could be closer to 35 total miles, I am officially forbidden from snarking on how dumb this sounds. We’re all equally sad and bored with life.

“It’s always on a Wednesday to avoid the weekend hiker traffic.”

And look at that start line photo! How do all these people get off work?! If I tried to pull a stunt like this, I’d be fixing typos on my LinkedIn by noon pm.


Ryan Parker

Member #: 1548
Race name: Top Pot 5k
When was this race? 4-29-2018
How did you place?! 11th place overall
Race website: Link
*Your* website URL: Strava
Race report:

This was my first race since Thanksgiving so it was painful! My only goals were to run hard, show Samir Rahman who’s the boss, and eat some donuts after. Mission accomplished!

Did iRunFar interview you before or after the race?: No

Shoeless Joe Sez!

“who’s the boss”


Get it? 😀

(Thanks for this paragraph Ryan. Your dollar is in the mail.)


Trisha Steidl

Member #: 328
Race name: Whidbey Island Marathon
When was this race? April 22
How did you place?! 3rd woman overall, 1st masters woman
Race website: http://runwhidbey.com/run/
Race report:

I didn’t want to run it because I had been dealing with a hamstring injury since Chuckanut and my left leg hasn’t worked normally since, but I knew I could and you never know, maybe today my L leg would surprise me and finally feel ok.

Warmed up, got to the start line, saw there were three fast women there (prizes only go to top three), and almost asked the race folks to drive me to the finish (it’s a point-to-point course). Note: In the past 6 years, the winning time has only been “fast” the two years I’ve run this race.

Gun went off, we ran across the bridge (beautiful), my L leg reminded me that it didn’t like to move normally, but it was just fine enough to not drop out on the other side of the bridge where my friend was standing, taking photos.

L leg finally felt warmed up somewhere between mile 6 and 7, giving me a glimmer of hope.

11 miles in I was 3:30 behind places 1-3 (they were all together). I did some in-race math (not usually a good idea)…That meant that by the end I would be at least 10 mins behind. That was a frustrating prospect.

Most of the rest of the race was spent feeling discomfort and pain move from area to area of my L leg and trying to get it to move with some semblance of normalcy (that glimmer I felt earlier was truly just a glimmer). I also learned that my L leg had zero ability to push off going uphill. The course is very hilly. These two things are not a good combo. (Running an easy effort up a hill in a marathon because your leg doesn’t work and not because you’re dead tired is excruciatingly frustrating.)

Around mile 15 a lady passed me near the top of a hill. That was irritating. Fortunately, there was a downhill right after and I “took off” (taking off is a relative term). Around mile 19 she passed me near the top of another hill (the 5th of 5 in a row). Fortunately, again, there was a downhill soon after and I, again, “took off.”

At mile 20, I figured I only had a little over 6 miles left, so I might as well finish the darn thing (this decision was made harder every time I saw my friend driving by in her van…I really wanted to get in that van).

A little later I could see the 3rd place lady far in the distance and was determined to catch her. I still had 5-6 miles to catch her and since she had been so far ahead, I though I had a pretty decent shot. I caught her with a few miles to go and then was determined that “hill lady” wasn’t going to catch me since I was now in 3rd place.

My L leg felt terrible and I continued to use all the mental strength I had to get it to move into the strong headwind we were now running into.

I could see 2nd place’s (and fellow SRC teammate’s) pink calf sleeves up ahead. Unless she died hard, I wasn’t going to catch her, but you never know what might happen in the last 1.5 miles of a marathon, so I had to stay on it (and I was sure hill lady wasn’t too far behind).

I finished in 3rd place, not that the announcer mentioned anything as I came in and crossed the finish.

It was probably the most mentally taxing race of my life and also high on the list of the most disappointing. What I was proud of was a) how mentally strong I stayed despite all the discomfort in and lack of my leg working and b) to work my way up to 3rd on a bad day made the experience sting just a little less.

Yep, some rough days are really rough. We’ve all had ’em. They’ll make us stronger, even though they suck donkey balls in the moment (especially when that moment lasts a few hours). Keep at it!

Did iRunFar interview you before or after the race?: No

Shoeless Joe Sez!

“I had been dealing with a hamstring injury since Chuckanut and my left leg hasn’t worked normally since…”

I feel like my left leg/hamstring hasn’t worked normally since about 2013!

High Five

“It was probably the most mentally taxing race of my life and also high on the list of the most disappointing. What I was proud of was a) how mentally strong I stayed despite all the discomfort in and lack of my leg working and b) to work my way up to 3rd on a bad day made the experience sting just a little less. Yep, some rough days are really rough. We’ve all had ’em. They’ll make us stronger, even though they suck donkey balls in the moment (especially when that moment lasts a few hours).”

As my ankles cry and gray chest hairs threaten to clog up my drain during my Tuesday and Friday night baths, I’m reminded that I might agree to suck on a donkey’s balls if it meant I could pull off one more 3rd place in a marathon! Never don’t be proud of fighting to the end!